Last weekend I surprised my sistercousin, Heather, when I showed up
at her new home in North Carolina the day before her wedding.
I refer to Heather as my sistercousin because we are very close; in age, in experience, in interests, in spirit. We were born 5 days apart in the summer of 1986, and basically spent every summer of our childhood together.
Heather and I, in utero
Heather moved to San Francisco for school when we were eighteen, and I stayed in New Jersey for college, but I got to see her with more frequency when my bands started touring through the bay area. Eventually I met Eloy and moved to Los Angeles, and she would drive down to spend weekends on our couch. My fondest memories in LA involve Heather. But last year, Heather moved back to North Carolina, which is the second time I lost my cousin to that state. She and her family had moved there from New Jersey in fourth grade. It was tough, but we still saw her on our Easter trips to the Outer Banks, and she would come back to spend the summer in New Jersey with my family every year.
cutting a deal
pack n play days
Heather went back to North Carolina in search of family and stability. She found that in her partner, Guy Sholar. They were schoolmates who both left their home state, and ultimately came back to find each other in adulthood. I've never seen someone who makes my cousin so whole and at ease.
It's really magical to watch the two of them.
Heather told me from day one she would marry Guy, so when she told me they were engaged and expecting their first child, I wasn't at all surprised. They set a date - August 15th, 2015 - and I knew I wouldn't be able to make it. I didn't have the extra money to spend, and I had already planned on going to see her in October. I told her I couldn't make the wedding, but it was ok, because I'd be there soon enough. Heather enlisted my father to be the officiant at her wedding. She confided in him that while she was excited about her upcoming nuptials, it just didn't feel right knowing I wouldn't be there. So my dad privately offered to fly me out as a surprise for Heather. We coordinated it just right, so that my mom wouldn't know either and I would show up a day before the wedding to surprise them both. This also happened to be the same day Heather and Guy would find out the sex of the baby, so it was an already emotional day for everyone, full of happy tears.
My arrival was no exception.
Guy and I have exchanged messages and texts, and bonded over our mutual love of Heather, but throughout the year or so of them dating, I never met him in person. This surprise visit was the first time I got to meet the love of my cousin's life. He knew I was coming, and made sure Heather was on the porch when I pulled in the driveway. She squinted to see who was pulling up, and instantly burst into tears when she recognized my blonde, bespectacled head. We hugged and laughed and cried. It had been over a year since we last saw each other. (I've since vowed never to go that long without seeing my cousin again, no matter how much budgeting I have to do.) We went to surprise my napping mom together and hugged and cried some more.
I'll spare you more sentimental details and dive into the pictures (with minimal storytelling)...
